I just realized (as if my last blog didn't explain it that well) I am:
1. Jealous
2. Hurt
3. Betrayed
4. Depressed
It's 8:40pm and I just woke up from a 2 hour nap and usually I take a nap if I'm not feeling good. I sat up, checked my leg (since my leg is the first sign I'm sick---that's where I have my blood clots. YES, more than 1) and it was okay. I checked to see if I had a fever (on my tummy) and nothing. I get up and turned back on my computer and that's when it hit me. Guillermo was online but there was no message or text from him. AT ALL.
I realized that I am in that "break up" mode: depressed, sad, crying every time I think of him. Ali mentioned when she broke up with her first boyfriend, she couldn't stop eating while her friend stopped eating. I thought I was going to be the non-eating friend but apparently I'm Ali.
I definitely need to find me a Jake somewhere to help me get over Guillermo. I thought this Mike that I met would be the one, but talking on the phone we didn't click. Now I am back to square 1 and feeling like this. Hopefully this will change soon.
Aww it'll get better! Don't worry... it passes. I've been there before and I know it feels painful but the hurt goes away. Trust me. I'm around if you need a friend :) And for the record, I am mad at what's his face (Guillermo, buT I'm calling him what's his face since he is no longer worthy of having a name.)
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