My "Goodbye" letter to Guillermo

After pulling myself semi together for work (I cried from his house to home and all night and all the way to work), I wrote my official break up letter to Guillermo.  Many corrections had to be made but this is it for me.  Being with Guillermo for over a year takes a toll on one, especially with everything we been through.  Yes it was unconventional, untraditional, un-whatever but quoting Jon and Kate Gosselin: "it's our life"  Just like the show, I am calling it quits with Guillermo--not just because for my sanity or because he can't give me what I want (an official relationship), but because I don't want him to feel bad every time he hurts me (if he does).

I thought I would be fine with the reason you gave me but I'm not. You gave up even before we tried, as if you didn't want to try. You know how I feel about you and maybe I should have said those little words but I didn't want to scare you either. I can't be constantly coming over, "playing" around and not feel anything. Maybe WE (yes because it was my fault too) should have not kissed that first night a year ago. Actually I wished WE never did that, then things wouldn't be the way they are now. You said for me not to think about it, just go with it, but one of us has to think of reason and that is me.

I don't want to, but if it will help stop the crying then I have to suck it up and do it. Guillermo, I can't do this anymore. I can't be the one night and while I'm not fooling around with other guys, you're doing that with other girls. I can't see you anymore.

 We can't be friends because we lost that too and you know it. We tried to be just friends but it's not there anymore. I'm sorry and I should have told you this last night but, like you knew, I was holding back the tears. 1 thing I promised myself I wouldn't do in any situation was to cry in front of a guy and I knew if I started to say this, I would have cried.

 I will always remember the good times we had, but most importantly I will always miss you. You will be my first Jacob AND Edward.


One more thing... I love you.